Aries
March 21st – April 19th
You might lose your next game. Or your next bet. Be careful.

Taurus
April 20th – May 20th
Chaos is coming.

Gemini
May 21st – June 20th
If you keep calling yourself two-faced as a joke, it’ll happen.

Cancer
June 21st – July 22nd
Don’t psychoanalyze people.

Leo
July 23rd – August 22nd
Bask in your power, but don’t abuse it.

Virgo
August 23rd – September 22nd
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Libra
September 23rd – October 22nd
Stop focusing on balance, go make chaos.

Scorpio
October 23rd – November 21st
Enjoy Halloween. It’s your time of the year.

Sagittarius
November 22nd – December 21st
Chill out for a few minutes. Take care of yourself.

Capricorn
December 21st – January 20th
Don’t do any more Buzzfeed quizzes.

Aquarius
January 21st – February 18th
Go be an anarchist. We know you want to.

Pisces
February 19th – March 20th
Beware. Just beware.